knights-of-the-old-caliphate

In The Name of Duty~

2012-01-28T03:58:00.000-08:00

Salam. Good day, wishing dear readers well.

Currently have blurred thoughts due to several changes in my planned programs, I have to adjust and that makes me acknowledged we cannot foresee, but nevertheless we must always plan a move.

Well, today I think wanna express my thoughts on a matter "Politics at work". Feel free to comment me and correct me.

My little experiences made me judge that workplaces are notorious place for work politics. Whether its about promotion or just about raise, the "unimaginable" can always change to "absolute vicious" when one decides its best to actively involved dirtily. Power struggles are common and many are easily noticeable.

However, whatever the reasons behind, I think that completely ignoring the power of dirty working politics will affect us especially if the target is ourselves. One too dull to notice might fall victim to these menaces. I have had few occasions, but then I managed to overcome them. My advice is be natural, try to be one that can make people gladly cooperate without prejudice but pure honesty. I even told my men also in one of my briefings that "We must try to just be honest on your daily work and it should be helpful and will make us more efficient". Always revise ourselves, stop being manipulative but do keep in mind to learn how our own unique office politics work.

I am not that happy, although I know I must eliminate obstacles. Get to work properly and be raise accordingly, isnt that fair enough for all of us?? Unfortunately, not all people think like that. For Muslims, pray to Allah that we are saved from dangers of dishonesty and He blessed our work and accept it.

Well, its praying time. Please feel free to share if you have something related too. :-)
Salam.

2012-01-13T18:22:00.000-08:00

Salam.. Good morning to dear readers.

Life here is beginning to shine a bit. Although my thoughts are mostly on my family back home, more and more reasons are emerging for me to stay here. Its been good to have an understanding ring of colleagues and that I can always rely on. I am not alone now.
I still remember the first days here, alone and feeling so vulnerable, made me even vowed that.I will not rely on anyone here. That I will live here temporary, only for the sole purpose of working and sending money back home.

However, ideas arise over time, and with right timing..I found out a few more things to spend my life here. Got myself several new opportunities here, as well as various learning classes at nearby musolla and mosque. Well, I can certainly strive here.

Well, those are some of the good news here, couldnt find ideas to write some more. Got to head to Sri Gombak now, until next time. Salam

Of All Those Days..

2011-11-06T22:00:00.000-08:00

Salam..good day, everyone..

Dormant mood and challenges have been hard, at times even I couldnt find proper time to write. Sorry, downtime has been prolonged.

However, one should know that there's up and down in our life, just like "The calm after the storm". Here, I managed to force myself to write. Yup, its been a few months gap with my last post already.

When news hit me regarding my project problems, I had been too confident that it would be temporary. Yet I waited and still allocate my efforts, although others sure that the other side have compromised us..leaving us just like that. An issue of commitment arises and some team members were forced to leave as the insecurity of the project's grant was becoming more evident. So much money were spent, and many more will if we were to let ourselves doing our projects under our own financing. Many had quit their jobs for this, and some were married too. They had to look for alternatives, and took a toll on their time. I was among the hard-headed person, trying my best to steadfast, but arising problems got in the way. Had to return to hometown, and found a way to scrounge a small business for some time.

Currently serving in Klang, I had never looked back when I decided to take that job. This heart of mine bears a grudge for those time we were left to struggle, although sometimes along the way, news of the project finally progressing keep on coming. At first, I thought it was another rumor, too good to be true. I kept on continuing my silence, did not co-operate with them..with even more partners "abandoning the ship". Recently, I managed to attend an important meeting, and with reluctance had to accept that I am in "A road diverging into two different paths", one that in time I much choose the one that will lead me to my dreams. The risk is there, and I know indecisive will drag things further. I'll do my best here, even though the future is not certain.

Till that time and so on, I am sure Allah will guide me..as He always do.

So readers, till next time. (Hopefully, I will write another post asap too). Salam~

News Update: Do Ourselves a Favor

2011-06-05T21:20:00.000-07:00

(Picture from: http://crmweblog.crmmastery.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/news.jpg)

Salam.

Writing here in the middle afternoon is just not me, never done so..How I come to write this maybe the feeling of wanting to share. Sharing and if I am wrong, do correct me.

Most people know to talk, and daily life requires so many things to discuss with, to speak out with, to be debated with. Information got exchanged, as do money in a transaction. News are everywhere, if not enough..internet provides us with almost soooo numerous materials that can be read. Where most information can be directly interpreted and already contain enough info, much more may require some homework. For example, a magazine publishing an article about an uncertain yet fraud in a company. Further to make things straightforward, lets say it happens in your country, regarding a certain product that is currently a favorite within local population. What happen is that as quickly as possible, the news will travel as far as people can spread them via all types of media available. Caution levels are increased firstly, thanks to the news..but what is in store for the effects to the company is yet to come.

While some would go to the extend of verifying the information presented..others might be unaware of the real issue behind. This is what I am concerned with, the spreading of news that is yet to be confirmed. Rumors are good for increasing awareness, but unverified information will deal damage if not contained properly. Just imagine we are so actively spreading an unverified conviction that was later found not-guilty, what do we think have caused? Bayangkan pula, khabar angin tentang suatu penipuan dalam makanan yang kemudiannya didapati tidak benar. Berapa banyak kerugian yang ditanggung tuan punya perniagaan apabila jualannya menurun kerana kisah yang tidak benar itu disebar-sebar? Kita telahpun bersubahat menyebarkan fitnah. Should be shameful of ourselves. The effects of these happy-go-lucky spreading news will be amplified if we are involved in journalism. Those who do spread such stories as a profession should think about the possible outcomes of such information. How many people will read that? If you know better then verify the story first, go to length as you can because first of all, writing is your source of living. Think about how could you live by spreading such "gossips" or "rumors" and publish it, without the sense of oneself might involved in spreading "fitnah" all around.

Dear readers, let us learn to judge first, and refrain ourselves from spreading such stories. We must learn to obtain the news from both sides first, and whenever possible verify it with our own capabilities. If we going to publish or tell something, let it be a verified one. If not, ensure that we don't involve ourselves with committing possible sins, which we can simply avoid by not spreading such matters.

Pray, that Allah do not blind our hearts and guide us. Have a good day. Salam.

Just Intervention~

2011-05-17T18:50:00.000-07:00

Salam..

Few nights ago, I went to KLCC to "escort" my aunt invited for a show in Malaysian Philharmonic Room. Some nice rest too, spending the night by taking a good, cooling walk rejuvenating this bored soul (at that time). Very nice scenery :-). Sharing some pictures too here.

Until next time.
Salaam.

I cannot stop here~

2011-05-10T03:57:00.000-07:00

I am on emergency status. The results of a recent meeting hit me like the thunders. Cut off of my proposal money was a big shock. Tremendously affecting the outcome of the project. Currently allocating available resources and more funding, my resolve has never been stronger. Everything gor to be reorganized..fuu. Allah help me..dear readers pray for the best. I invested a lot and will fight to the see a good start and good end of this.

Forward, together..for the betterment of our brothers and sisters worldwide.

If I Must, Hesitations Must Go~

2011-04-27T20:01:00.000-07:00

Salam

The joint project Maru and I personally code-named "Super Nova" has been formally accepted and the government had shown interest in funding it. I did wrote that during the training period, the remaining 37th Slackers, Maru and Hanif will stand together if Allah permits our bidding in this. The many times headaches and skipping sleeps have been finally paid off. Alhamdulillah, Allah accepts all of us in our respective projects. My, the headaches are going to return again, but I promised myself not to skip sleep anymore. The way we wanted to be capable of joining others that has fast forwarded earlier in amal.

However, the approval of our BP proposal did not come without hesitations. Abide the good news suddenly I remember the training days where I think I am another person (adapted personality) doing so just to survive there. I can recall my awkwardness that I am not good at socializing, but I made my best there. I am not a good actor, but I strive myself. I am not even a good decision maker, I know I must be so forced myself to learn and start becoming one. I dont like to demand, but matters there required so, so I had to do it, along with a few more personality-changing objectives. Along the way, I got my aggressiveness, maybe unusual caution and even dismissed feelings, people or of my own when its decision versus feelings. Not to mention the "more socialized" me most notably..often during the training thinking I had to do it to temporarily. The unusual anger, the pretty demanding me back there. Like "If it needs to be done, it must be done". But remember I did not enjoy doing those personally. When the joint program ended, the "I-must-change" momentum back there slowly dissipated when I returned to my village and had to spent some time to be shake off these unusual characteristics to be myself back. Allocated some private times rethinking of who I am before the training and evaluation, and even astonished to believe that I had been like this and that there. And I think I am can only share this matter through this blog.

Earlier this week, I've been called to report back in. It looks like those days will come back. The days where we know challenges are always overwhelming, and I wonder to what extent this time? Maybe some will think I will be selfish along the way, but I'd rather think Allah knows my intention. The fact that during yesterday's consultation revealed the market value of the project is much higher than what we originally proposed, revived the momentum. I will go to the extremes to adapt to the potentially harsh challenges, but I will remember I am a Muslim. I am not those who do not even have moral values in doing business. If there's a need to change again, I must do so, even though permanent this time..but I will try to remember:-

That I should work to please Allah s.w.t.

That I would care more for our Muslim welfare

I wrote this so I will remember

Maybe I'm too ambitious, but I will strive to materialize my intentions.

Who Shall Reveal Me The "Truth"?

2011-04-18T17:50:00.000-07:00

Salam..

Currently dedicating some of my time to collect enough data for a new post, this one should address against deception that had been around for some time. Its time to purge these false doctrines out of our knowledge and replace them with a new one. InsyaAllah I will report my findings in the near future.

The Forgotten Meaning of Education~

2011-04-17T20:13:00.000-07:00

Salam..

How's today for dear readers? May Allah s.w.t have mercy for all of us, and eases our daily chores. A bit recovering from the "body weakness"..I found that I have to work out more as the more I do physicals, less tiring my body is in normal times. I also started taking energy boost drinks, and by the permission of Allah, keeps me up a bit and becoming better everyday.

A sermon from last Friday's prayer..had talked about a method in fiqh regarding "matlamat tidak menghalalkan cara" or whatever purpose does not permit ways against the syariah law. The "khatib" or the person giving sermon emphasized the matter in ways that many would not dare say against, since I found that he only read the part of the text given. Mostly sermon text were moderated, maybe for reasons far dated back in the age of caliphates where sermons sometimes caused uprising and so on. He stated that its already a common way, those who did it, almost unwittingly has to admit its well practiced in many countries, sadly Muslim countries. Many of those with political ambitions have been proven (did you know about those cases?) that chose to disregard legal ways permitted by Allah s.w.t..Also many of those with power/authority had been freely misusing their position. (Remember the recently caught Customs officers' case). While on the other hand, even more of those in the business field kept on doing "mengurangi timbangan" just what Allah s.w.t had prohibited..even cheating customers.

And yet those doing this will keep practicing this, until their days are off, or their lives are taken. Hopefully most will repent or given Allah s.w.t forgiveness should they seek for one. Since when we "should" had forgotten what is allowed/prohibited? Commonly heard excuses are "Common practice?" "Macam mana mau untung?" I know to certain extent that even Muslim traders cheat on their customers.. I am involved in a few trades, and also a personal experience of being a witness to a "politik wang" scenario in Malaysia. Why all these?

The sermon continued on to link this matter to the perception of education in the so-called "real-world" today. All that we knew today is to get our sons/daughters good education, but actually what were given are mostly "fardhu kifayah". I know, current knowledge on today's world is very important.. but we must not forgot about the urge to continue on study and the importance of compulsory "fardhu ain" education. When we mostly stress on roman alphabets, we forgot about the words of the Quran. When we stress about business and work, we forgot about the need to learn first about Islam's permitted ways regarding those matters. Above all, we pursue our degree, masters or phD, but we often forgot about the need to constantly gain "fardhu ain" along the way. We thought we we finished those as desired levels of education above, we are done..no more learning. Maybe the thought of having "dah ada orang belajar dah" or "nanti-nanti tua sikitlah" mindset is there. That's where the "matlamat menghalalkan cara" came from. We learnt the skills for our specialized work/job descriptions but we forgot Allah's guide, which Muslims should follow accordingly.

The sermon then reminded all present there to start gaining what was lost, and that those who had been involved in unlawful acts to repent. My advice is that let us do what Islam requires us to do, to our own extent. Disregard challenges to stray from Allah s.w.t permitted path. We are not like those people who work without any base guidance, or worst by not having moral principles in doing business. Allah knows best, and we should seek guidance only from Him..not making our own guide.

"Never wait to repent until its too late.."

Till my next writing. Salam~

Sense of Weakness~

2011-04-05T07:58:00.000-07:00

Salam~

Its been quiet these few days. Things seemed to slow down. No strange things currently as from my last entry recorded, alhamdulillah. Still living with my small business here. Keeping business up requires frequent travel..almost 3-4 times a day might be not so good for this body. I am sharing that since last week, I have been in a constant struggle against my own body. Its always against the race to catch up time for sales, for materials. Until now, I still feel very weak. Even for some basic things its like forcing my body to complete the task with excessive energy. The only thing that keeps me going is the very urgent need to maintain customers demands on time and of quality. Maybe something wrong with my body, since I knew well about my endurance before this.

Also, I am thinking of maybe the foods and less frequent of physical activity recently. Although I am trying to regulate my food, and fire up more physical activities..seems like there's a need to increase this. A few "accidents" have already occured because of my "extreme fatigue". I still pray to Allah to solve this, and I am going to ask from dear readers out there, hope of the best and do pray for me to get well soon. Think thats all for now. Already sweating as I've spent my time typing this entry.

Till next time~

.....Salam....

Truth is Life-Changing

2011-04-02T10:02:00.000-07:00

Salam..

Forgive me for not writing for so long. For the time being, got myself involved in small scale business operating from home. Home has been nice, especially because of the village area left almost unchanged for 20 years. Just nice enough, until I learnt a truth that the place was built up with devotion of human being to "something" other than Allah s.w.t. I have always been interested on how villages were founded on the first place. Remember, nowadays its easy because of the presence of machineries and tools. But how did human beings with outdated, even some stories did it with bare hands cleared out forest for the first place? Moreover, how community watch was done those days? Hiring private guards, CCTV?

For all the matters above, I wasnt there..and maybe would not know that until recently "disturbances" occured for some time. Many of the other houses experienced some kind of unexplained phenomena, alhamdulillah..Allah s.w.t protected me for the time being. The peak of the issue I am trying to explain to you is when my own grandmother stated she started to see "unusual" visuals and flashes of images normally unacceptable to us.But when I met the neighbours and swapped stories, clearly there is something strange. My grandma asked to be taken to meet a certain person (Bomoh) who knows of these origins and I asked why. She said the knowledge that person possess would insyaAllah will explain and may further eradicate these disturbances. I took her, but not directly, my grandma left with my father..along with my mother to seek some advices and guidances in the ways Islam permitted. The visitations lasted for a week, but the first day was quite shocking. I was asked by my father to recite some prayers and "ayatul-kursi" while opening all windows and doors, and was given with a large amount of salt to be distributed around the house. We did so, but the process did leave me feeling uneasy until today. I kept remembering the upstair room where that room give me a very unnerving aura that day when I sprinkled the salt inside. The room was not opened for months now until the day we opened it. Allah s.w.t knows..He is all-great..I know nothing.May He protect me and my family.

Then, after visitations to the particular person ended, I asked my grandma what happened there. This is the part where she revealed the story of how the village was founded. Those days, the founders were Muslims but lacked of knowledge and wisdom to differentiate "amalan yang betul dan yang tidak". They had learnt from somewhere/some people, knowledge of which now we know forbidden, to summon "things" and provide them with what they need. Among those, there are those who asked for strength (maybe for clearing forests and rocks), asked for guardian (s*ka, maybe). And all these "leftovers" never did leave the world yet as the original summoner already. This is what left, and from the stories revealed during interrogation upon summoned done by the "bomoh" to a few of my family, shocking news revealed that some were the results envious man that summoned these. I should not reveal why that happens. With that, that "bomoh" helped to cure partially, with the permission of Allah s.w.t did managed to reduce the disturbances until now.

Currently, I am writing in the very house I am telling you about. I'm sharing with you this because I wanted us to keep our believe and fear only to Allah. Its true, I am afraid, but must ask guidance and protection from Allah s.w.t. We all must, and keep our envy at bay..do not ruin other people's life. Allah s.w.t knows. Good rewards is for good deeds and bad rewards and punishment awaits those who dare worship other than Allah s.w.t. That is all for this entry. The surroundings are pretty dark here, my hands are shaking already. Although I can still joke with readers out there, but I cant hide the feeling from here. Will update on further news, broadcasting to you live from "the exact scene".

What's The Rush?

2011-01-22T04:23:00.000-08:00

Salam

Good day..even though mine is not as good. Nearly got hit by a car today, I am very pissed off. Its not my fault. Accustomed to the calm and against "pesky" environment, I would be easily disturbed upon being in a road-congested condition. Currently on standby in Gombak, I believe I have spend sufficient time to get to know my surroundings. Traveling around is a must, almost my daily chores.

For one thing I noted most, the traffic really bothers me. What should supposed to just become a congested road/highway would be a life-and-death situation. Accidents are common here.I have been in various conditions trying to evade and prevent accidents from materializing. I do not know what brings people to RUSH as if they are the only ones with important matters. In some situations I managed to put a quick glance revealed what I called "Ambulance-in-action".

More problematical is that I cannot unjustly put the blaim on everyone on the road, with some maybe having true emergencies. I believe there's major irresponsibility shown by the various road dwellers daily. Some are indeed attributable to the "stupids-always-rushing" types, purposely do not want to care for others around. Yang menjadi masalahnya, kesalahan2 sebegini dapat dilihat jelas, bagaikan di Malaysia begitu biasa seolah-olah tak ada adab. Minta maaf kalau menyinggung sesiapa yang membaca atau terbaca tetapi diri ini tidak boleh melihat tanpa menyebut walaupun sedikit. Yang kelam kabut dengan kerjanya, salah siapa? Yang xmahu pakai helmet dn berlawanan arahnya, akal di mana? Yang egonya, besar sgtkah diri itu? Jangan kerana "kekurangan akal" kita, orang2 tak bersalah menjadi mangsa. Baca doa naik kenderaan, jaga keselamatan diri dan pengguna lain sekitar kita, pun xdapat?

Currently I found a few way to "teach" these wrong-doers on the road, real time (on-the-go). I will catch up with the vehicle, knock the transport's mirror and give signs accordingly. To those "verily" busy, like answering call or replying sms on the move, I show the sign no phone. I purposely rush to the front of "crazy" drivers and block them for a while and show the sign to slow down. I even showed the helmet sign if I found those "steel-headed" motorcyclists. I managed to alert some, and although some come with negative responses..I do not care. Remember before you make a life-threatening decision on the road, where the "someone" might be your family/relatives.

A Student's Travel

2011-01-20T20:58:00.000-08:00

Pic from: http://francescolejones.wordpress.com/

Salam.

How are you readers out here? Hopefully you are doing well in your daily chores.

I was traveling since last Wednesday..and only arrived home last night at 8 pm. Well, I must call it such a night-day-night event. A day full of events except for this morning waiting for my mate. Since its Thaipusam, the road was pretty congested.Even the KTM and RapidKL are significantly affected. I went to a former GE member of the Symbiosis UPM 2010 and had asked for repairs on the laptop. Alhamdulillah. All was settled.

But the main story is yet to materialize. During my travel back to Gombak from Kajang, I was to escort my mate to a construction site nearby Sri Gombak. He had been summoned by someone who is supposedly his sponsor. The project was to supervise the construction of a plant nursery there, conduct and train tissue culture for the workers. This is where I learn many things. Of the few hours talking and sharing..somehow I came to realize about certain matters I concluded as very valuable experiences. Its somewhat enticing.

Among those I learned revolves around:-

1.How actual negotiations occured

2.The need of strong "bargaining chip"

3.Preparation beforehand (learn particular details)

4. Give practical solutions rather than impractical babbling

5. Steady-No rushing to close a deal

6.Its not just business, its also about making partners

7. Lastly, no "weakness showcase" when its your field of expertise

Feeling unease with current knowledge, I know I must learn more. I am a student for my whole life..I must remember that.It will be essential in the near future. For now, that's all I can write. Will now heading for the Friday prayer.

So that's for now. Until later. SALAM~

Run Towards The Target, Not Just Walk~

2011-01-12T06:58:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Greetings to all. May 2011 brings all the best for all dear readers out there.

Been in UPM for a few days..Ya, met a lot of people, the lab staffs, the lecturers. Almost all of them was the same. I was very happy for them, but remembering the late Dr. Kassim Abas was there anymore was the first on my thoughts when I saw his best friend, Dr. Abdulkarim. Please, before we continue..recite and dedicate al-fatihah for the late Dr. Kassim.

Something was recently found to be disturbing. Images of the past year, during my final year project doesnt seem want to leave me. Ever since the first step back there at the Faculty of Food Science and Technology, the memories came alive. I did not know why I suddenly hurried to the lab today and just like a person in awe, watch those final year students performing for sometime until I realized again..that I wanted to recall those moments. The moments,yes..very much unique. Some of them were oblivious:

I did once break open the lab because I had to conduct the test at that time when the officers in charge forgot, I recalled some of the 10pm time where I was still trapped doing my work there..and some much nastier. But it had to be done. Maybe the haunting memories were "balasan" for me? Figure it out.. :-)

During some of the time spent there, many of those present remember me..and questions started to be fired upon me? "Wah, sambung master kah?" "Jadi tutor ke?" My reply was swift: : "Tak, kursus dgn MTDC je. Keja sendiri je."

Dear readers, pray for me. I am running towards my vision, I'll do my best and if Allah so wills it. InsyaAllah, until next time.

Salam~

The Choice, The Training and The Cost~

2011-01-07T02:37:00.000-08:00

Salam.

Good day to readers out there :-).

This week as I am writing this signals the end of my training in Symbiosis UPM-MTDC 2010. There's a lot to learn from, since only a handful of colleagues are fresh grads, and alhamdulillah, some of them were my closest friends. Most were more experienced, already have around 10 years of business experience. Its something I realized had been a very difficult to enroll in, since its not my nature. It had got me thinking for some time and its been a decision I made for myself, when people around me asked whether I know of my decisions like "Are you for real?" Well, today's going to be a day of explanations. (Even the GE units of the Symbiosis reading this do not know)

When I first got the call, I got to choose only one since all three interviews are on the same day. My family were thinking I would take the other jobs since this one is not my type but I choose what I thought best. The deal was made earlier with Maru and Hanif, that this opportunity paves the way which we were looking for. My previous post was one of the main reasons I chose this training, promised my mates we will stand together with this..and meet the peers expectations to be enrolled in.

Well, and here goes..I did pray, that if its the only way..of be able to do something rather than talk about the problems of common people like us, that I be changed to meet what is needed. During the training period, many matters are alien enough for me, even the environment is totally not easy to adept. I even thought where did I got myself into, and thought about my compatibility. I continue on praying that Allah give me what is needed..and over time I got what is needed, in exchange of some of my personalities. But what did I learn is that changes can be very dramatic. At times I really knew what I was doing was totally not my regular self but then I forced myself to bear it, untuk tebalkan muka dan paksa diri demi melayakkan diri. The only thing in my mind is that do what must be done. Still I can remember the I don't like it to be too interactive or had to force for decisions. There are many more matters forcing me to adept but then I choose so not to enlist them here. However just after 2 weeks, I can began to see how my interaction differs. I did another personality test and found out I care less for people, I demand things, I tend to assume command, I can easily get angry..how easy it is to change~!

Somehow in between the training period, I met my college-era friends. We talked and just in a few hours some did say I am different? Got me thinking for some time, the costs of the change may affect me worst if I can have them in control in the near future. I think I should learn to have a better self-consciousness over myself before I slipped away too far. I will change for what is needed but will not sacrifice moral values in paving way to my dreams. Let us all pray that Allah s.w.t guide us and not let us destroy our own lives.

For we ever got lost, there should be a way to return,..if not how did we walked ourselves into the same road before?

A Cause To Live With~

2010-12-17T17:13:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Always hoping that readers out there are safe and sound. I have been in a training under UPM-MTDC Symbiosis program for some time, even night..sometimes going around the country to gather or meet people.

For those may be asking, its entrepreneurship training..with incubation period of 2 years.

Before I address the matter in concern, I wish that all of us would evaluate every action,even the purpose of you taking any job because what matters more is that we are not drones,we can think. Human beings are the greatest creations Allah s.w.t made, and we have our responsibilities. We are indeed influenced by the environment, be it the demanding pace of life that requires we to struggle, most notably to earn a living. But come to think here, that the causes we are pursuing today may be no more than self-centered desires. It's like WORK MORE-EARN MORE-SPEND MORE-DREAM OF MORE. Yes, it is common today. I remember I came across a human resource book stating that the current workforce today are working to spend. Me too cannot deny of such desires.

But then~~

We should not forget, there are various people out there. For those who aren't aware, there are people who prey on others, whom I may address as vultures after this and those who become the victims of such situation. Those that take advantages over others can be easily seen, especially those in positional power and in business area (My apologies to those that are sincere to their cause). How I wished I could reveal the vulture faces, but I am sorry..its not the time yet.It's happening behind the scenes, sometimes in front of us, covered by so-called innocent donations and givings, or even doing "deeds" nationwide but then behind us manipulation and corruption is there.These vultures happily stripped off everything for themselves that should have belong equally to all of us..made many suffer and does not even care what is the long term effects on the people around them, especially in Malaysia. Yet, the public may have not been properly addressed, may be to the best of intentions. Believe in me-I have seen and talk to a number of people, sometimes the victims themselves..especially when meeting certain people with proper connections.

There are also people who have either been the victims of these vultures, or do not have the same opportunity like us. Most of us had our chances to be up to the tertiary level of education, graduated and most already ended up with a good job. However, it is important to remember, where our positions lie afterward, will we become slaves? With our minds manipulated by the today's desires until we forgot that there are people that destroys others life/ the victims themselves..we are in the right direction the vultures are setting us/want us to think. To be engulfed in own life, so that they can continue to harvest everything from us, even more devastating to those that are not 'lucky' like dear readers out there.

What I believe is that all of us can contribute something to lessen the effects. I wished that every single one of us that have the capacity to aid, please do so. Get in charity organizations, get in non-profit missions to help those in need. Allocate some time to think, where do I can contribute the best to the people? How can I contribute back to the society? Can i donate for a better education of my brothers and sisters nationwide/worldwide. An example: For muslims, remember our zakat: Its surprisingly notable that just a number of people gave their zakat. Most would rather care their taxes than the zakat. Believe in me, when we start to think, search those in need and we might be surprised how many have we missed or should have aided to reduce whatever the damages the vultures had done to our society.

It is also important to note that those with influences and positional powers to guide and encourage those under their responsibilities to contribute to the society. And that those with proper jurisdiction that have powers to regulate (may have even been doing so all this time) the vultures. Hopefully all reading this will answer the call, that there is a greater need to contribute to the society, even more demanding against our desires. It's not wrong to have desires, to work and earn something for ourselves, but remember the responsibility for the society (especially Malaysian society I am addressing) is very demanding that requires every single one of us "untuk turun padang" to contribute.

This is a cause whereby everyone should dedicate their life: To be able to contribute back to the society. InsyaAllah which a little patience, I will acquire my own company. Having set the vision with priority to society contribution.. Its my way is to be in control and nurture more people fighting for the cause and in time hopefully will have the proper capital needed to do whatever is needed. Do what we can in our own area, aid each other..even though we still cannot cover all those in need in our lifetime, hopefully our next generation will carry on what i call "to continue on the visions of the dead", our vision to see a more healthy community.

Let us allocate some time to think what we can do, plan and utilize this as a strong drive to believe and fight on for the years to come~

<<>>

Men of Times 2

2010-12-05T15:09:00.000-08:00

HANIF

This person, if you ask me..I can remember the exact event where I first met him. During the first grouping of BSTM personnel on the 14th College orientation week, 5th July 2006. Currently having a new look, the men of 37th Slackers are more than able when we laughed at him all the way whenever his looks were compared back then. But nevertheless its just the facial looks, not the Hanif we knew, not the Hanif I knew. In truth, he came clean, with innocent and yet honesty are brimming from his soul, directly noticeable. We shaked hands together, exchanged pleasantries and asking our hometown. Then came the faculty orientation day. Back then, when I saw his final CGPA from matriculation, after seeing the "legendary" Mior CGPA (at that time only, ok? :-P)..I thought I was a loser.

These two mates have the best pointer out of all of the other BSTM slacker boys! But its not just his pointer, his manners prove it that he is "holier than thou". My decision? : I decided to keep a close distance between Mior and Hanif, thinking of wanna try to get some good study lessons from them. Well, close enough to notice that among these two, Hanif proves to be successful in terms of maintaining among "the best relaxation elapsed time" vs Mior. He can be found more in his sanctuary (room) than outside it. But on one occasion, I think almost everyone that took PHY2001 can still recall that he nearly missed a 2-hour Physics class, barely arriving it at the last 15 minutes. All eyes trained on him,including the lecturer who gave him an armor-piercing look~!. Haha, and he remember that as a good lesson.

A person who loves food, and the foodlovers in terms of "knows all,sees all,eats all..". He's a prove to us that anything edible shouldnt be left untouched. If you try to his eating speed or capacity either, you are more than welcomed. We never won against him. :-P..Loves to give new food stalls a try,always keen on finding a chance to "slurppp" the ABC..However a distinct personality above all is that he a generous person. He's always manage to find some time to get the boys some good place,takes us there and pays for all of it. Never berkira la, easy to say. Keep wondering when is the next time..oh and I forgot to mention, he's great at cooking~!! Fuh, all should try taste his cooking, Hear I say..book him,before the boys do.

Another point worth noting there is that he shares the same interest with Mior in cars, but his favourite interest is in racing cars. I can only imagine and wonder what are these two talking about once they met and starts conversation about this car and that car,ohhh..certainly out of my interest. He sometimes even dreamed about those cars if he's been talking about em too much in a day..Go and ask him, he'll admit.

Also not forgetting, he's possess a good family aspiration,meaning family is his prime dedication..whatever he do,family goes first..what can I say..hmm, maybe a "family man"..ya,sort of a person that could be a good father..so single women are welcomed to contact him,but careful there..be ready for rejection for he has his own point of view on this.

That is all I could write about him.but for further references contact him,of course~!!

And that concludes Mr Muhammad Hanif bin Miskandar.

HAZMIR

Firat impression: What??!Its a kid in disguise!..This description suits him better. Hazmir a.k.a "Kecik"..with his looks and size, people will start judging this friend of mine,but usually will go and get to know him..and you'll know him as a well-mannered person. This is a friend one should value most for his helping hand and always try to say yes when one needs help. His background of being the laughing stock had been bringing him into so much conflicts during his school days, and the bad jokes people doing on him are too much until he became immune to such mockery. Yes, he will not response if one mock him, but careful enough to always reply in a good manner, resulting him as a well-accepted person in the UPM community.

Talking about the first time I met him, as I said before..is a pleasant experience. The first time I met him, was in his room, end of the 12th college. Prepping to go to orientation session. Yes, is was there. Always constantly brimming with energy, and appears to be a natural joke-maker. He always have a high attraction around him, bringing people here and there together and getting along with any type of people without much problem.

When it comes to study, he's always trying to find a way to improve..sometimes ready to go beyond what the 37th Slackers boys imagination of doing things, and makes him unique in his unending spirit. Sometimes during exams, I remember..he got away from us and study away for some time that even we could have thought where'd he gone.Ya,ya..for those waiting for him to slack off..here's a few: hehe.. A consistent sleeper in class, he always managed to best Hanif in terms of "siapa kantoi dgn lecturer lg kerap". Why is he's sleepy at class times? He's a BUSY person. Entrusted with many responsibilities, here's a man you can count in. With his mobility, he certainly good at multitasking and extremely active in sports. I'm telling dear readers out there..despite his small size..He's one of the famous all-round sporstman in UPM, even representing Malaysia in hockey tournaments on various occasions. Gets the best game,gets in the best event~~

Not forgetting..in culinary, he is not-your-average-joe. He cooks and comparable to Mr Hanif's skill. Well, ask him to go to his house..and he cooks for you: custom made! Believe in me, the boys already tasted and we all approved that he's such a cook. On the other hand, he possesses a great deal of interest in outdoor activities and also philosophy. When it comes to holidays (if any is for him), he opt for anything related to outdoor activities. You can go and ask him where is a good outdoor place he hasn't come across around him, and you will acknowledged him for his experiences. He spent a lot on upgrading his outdoor equipment, so dont think this person doesnt care what he looks, but good looks are a must for him~. :-). On the philosophy part, books related to positive thinking and self-improvement will be a very good present for this "brainy creature". He likes to improve over time and can always be invited for such sessions, every time will try to emulate like a counselling session. He will read the type of books described over and over again, and will eventually come out with his own processed output..translating it in his own life and preaching it to the men and women around him.

Currently jumping job by job, he is still searching for the right job that suits him..and know that this person can easily enter the workforce. So, my final words that suits him would be "Small arms,big heart".
And there goes for this "small" friend of mine, Hazmir bin Alang Abd Hamid~

Intersection~

2010-10-18T08:41:00.000-07:00

Salam :-)
I am busy recalling info about my mates..so the update would be tomorrow. But here's something to ponder around for a while~

There are 3 types of people in this world:

those who MAKE things happen

those who WATCH things happen

and those who WONDER what happened

A Turning Point: "Men of Times"

2010-10-16T09:47:00.000-07:00

Salam..

Good day, everyone..for I have always wanting my dear readers to be safe and sound.
Ya, I admit, its been a while..and this post shall mark the end of my days as a student.

Yes, the study days has ended, just to begin to talk about what we did, how much sacrifices had to be made..and truly, the convocation date of 12th October 2010 mark the end of such time. I did spend some quality time with some of my once holed-up colleagues, rewinding the times we thought we might not being able to finish our studies. People say time will heal such wounds, and indeed it's right. The scars have healed fully. Those who still remember might be smiling at the moment reading this.

But then, time will pass as shall unrecorded memories. So I decided to recall my personal memories of my friends, who's been with me side by side all this time. Do remember that this is my personal thoughts..no offense, mates..you all know me well.

So, here goes:~~~~~~

MIOR

The story about this particular friend of mine stretches to the earliest memories I was in UPM. Yap, it means he's one of the first person I knew there.We met in the orientation week, being in the same group, fate @takdir put us much more closer than the other group members since we are coursemates. Yeah, we begun to know each other more since that day. If I am not mistaken, I believe most of my time during the orientation week involves this person around with me, including "Sesi wajib lepak dulu-study kemudian di kafe malam2".

About him, when I began to notice this person, among my first impression is that he is a bright one and full of determination. On one occasion, in the faculty's secretive chapter of Golden Key 2006/2007, he stood firmly, refusing a direct order from the head of the society, a well-known professor in our faculty to use the English language in the meeting. Hoho, what a person. Yet also among the best to join Bac.of Food Science and Technology (BSTM) year 2006. But still am I shocked when I learned that his main aim was to learn to be a cook via this course. I thought he would be one but..it just disappear over time? I don't know what happened to that ambition now, try go and ask him. He might deny, but I remember as a witness :-P. I always thought I would never get past this person academically :-)

Always at the ready to lead, he is indeed a natural leader. Maybe this also can be related due to his nature as the eldest son in his family. "Anak sulunglah katakan~!" Most of us would gather willing in his room periodically, either with a good purpose (study etc.) or you-know-what-boys-do-when-they-gather moments (swapping stories, or taking turns playing prank on each other, and so on).

When talking about food..He's picky. Known to be extremely avoid foods with garlic, he had always been the laughing stock when it comes to such foods. Becoming the 2nd person to own a car in terms of the BSTM boys, he became our own "private taxi" more than Maru due to his "leadership".Indeed he was from a wealthy family. But do remember, that he is not an arrogant person, he is a man who will step for you in times of need, someone who you can count for when hard times come. Its also worth to notice that its going to be bloody hard to get his trust back to you when you betray him.

Currently a "factory manager" in Deligateux Sdn. Bhd., he is slowly becoming a family man from his usual "one-man army". Ask him, what's that..secret or not, this one depends solely on him. Well, that's Mior~

MARU

If Mior is the among the firsts, then Maru is none to second. Befriended him and made most of my earlier days in UPM with this person. Yeah, and I mean it. We were among the minority of boys that didnt get into the main flow, unlike Mior, Hanif and some other guys. We had to take the "long road to victory". Forced to take many fundamental courses together, he's stuck with me for the first 2 years I think. We took calculus when others took organic chemistry, we took English classes late and even stuck up in various compulsory subjects in UPM. I still recall the days where we became "serabut, unorganized" as we are out of the mainstream. We had to struggle more and knew it was worth the trouble to catch up with others.

Those times are when I got to know him. He is a different person initially. People who didn't know him well, plus a limited personality assessment would cause trouble knowing this person. During the first days, most of the girls would consider him an "arrogant" person, but in reality, he is not. Who knows him better, me or you? (except his future wife and family, of course). Who spent most time, is it you women of BSTM or me? No,no..he isnt an arrogant person. FYI, he is a shy person "dulu2"..he wont speak to women unless its important, doesn't make jokes with women he doesnt know, or doesnt want to know. So go spend some time with him, and I promise you'll know the real Maru. As for the current Maru, everyone get evolved@changed over time, whether it is noticed or not. Now becoming a person with a broad range of contacts and links, he befriended a whole lot of others, including the women who were once avoiding him..creating bridges between us men and women of the BSTM.

By the way he looks, one might be mistaken that he is just like Mior (anak sulung), but the truth is he is the opposite one. Being the last sibling (bongsu) in his family doesn't make him looked minor, in fact..he is the one that that inspired hardworking to earn a living. It is interesting to know that he is a descendant of a family who values independent and hardworking, every single of his family members is becoming successful person over time. His story of hardworking earned its roots from the early days of his family. He used to tell me that even Twisties snacks were hardly available for them (his siblings and him), as so do dinners. He became used to it, and abruptly become a person with the ability to utilize any resources available. This one make him a very not-the-picky type of person when it comes to food. This trait is further enhanced by his ability to make use of any opportunity for an earning, making him a very successful entrepreneur. I also did some business some time ago under his guidance. There's even a saying goes among us "When its business, its all Maru". Also this had to do for this person to spend less time "lepak" without any income, but not that he cant unwind with the men of 37th Slackers, particularly in bowling sports. Heh, one of our best 10-pin bowlers.

Not only well known for his business prowess, he is one that holds a very high accountability. You can trust him with things you would hesitate to rely upon others, and he is a person with wisdom of giving practical solutions for many matters. Oh, and before I forgot, this person shares a high amount of interest with gadgets, en massing a huge selection of gadgets for various personal and business uses. Well, not forgetting the lady in his life, futher information can be confirmed by her or Maru himself. Wanna know? Ask Maru la..

Hmm, and there goes another of my mate. Stay tune for more revelation~ :-)

After A Long Rest~

2010-05-17T03:26:00.000-07:00

Salam..Its been weeks since my last post..still planning somtime later to reveal all recent events, the causes and effects of many things but for now, I'll entertain readers out there with lyrics of a song that I really like its meaning:-

"PROTOTYPE-Chiaki Ishikawa"

When innocence turns into a simple power

It creates shadows in the world

Even if you wanted to touch the existence of light

That lies across the glass case

You couldn’t lower your raised hand

But crouched down as if falling

Prototype boy, with only ideals for tomorrow

You won’t become a lovely story to be passed down

But the brink of this place, where you seem to lose yourself

Suits you so much that it’s sad

The lie-like silence

Is like the forerunner for the tiny rip that bursts open

A gaze that feels excessive

Won’t even overlook the trembling of your knees

Or even the common hypocrisy

That provokes your hands

Prototype boy, your heart is stolen away

With your restlessness that keeps making ambiguous jabs

The wreckage, which once lived, that surfaces in this area

Has started to be visible to your alter ego

Nevertheless, I shelter you

The reaction between impatience and inattention

Is ceaseless; your selfishness is wavering

When it comes to the sentiments now, you shake your head at them

But they’re disposable prototypes

What lives is yourself, right?

Now you can’t think… You can’t think…

Prototype boy, with only ideals for tomorrow

You won’t become a lovely story to be passed down

But the brink of this place, where you seem to lose yourself

Suits you so much that it’s sad

Prototype boy, your heart is stolen away

With your restlessness that keeps making ambiguous jabs

The wreckage, which once lived, that surfaces in this area

Has started to be visible to your alter ego

Nevertheless, I shelter you

How much already? How many missed? How long left?

2010-04-12T22:00:00.000-07:00

Salam..good day to everyone reading. :-)

Alhamdulillah. Recently I just came back from journey,and I would like to share some talks I attended.

There was a scholar, praise be to Allah but a talk he gave that put me on my feet.

Among the lessons last night, was that "Remember, always keep in your mind. This last ummah is given with nobility with the work of the Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. Never before all the sins from the earlier human days have been accumulated in this age..It is everyone and each of us to preach the truth, there's no doubt".

And do remember, time never returns. See the clock ,see your own self, see the passing time. I am already 23 years old, an average of 1/3 of usual 60-70 years of living. Now that we always wish happy birthdays to people, we love it too when others wish us..but it should be taken as "What should I do as my age is increasing?"

The answer I got from the scholar was: "What goodness you can do, practice it.. What forbidden things by Allah you can leave, leave it as much as you could. Make intentions to practice, convey the words to others not around. Tell all you can, that it is whether you are ahead of your time, or its the other way round". Which means "Berapa banyak kebaikan yang kamu mampu lakukan, lakukan. Jangan kerana tak dapat lakukan semua, kamu tinggalkan semuanya. Kemungkaran yang ada, berapa yang dapat kamu tinggalkan, tinggalkanlah. Timbulkan keinginan untuk lakukan, dan sampaikan seberapa yang mampu. Samada kita mendahului masa atau sebaliknya.

Come to think that, when people say they are bored..have anyone thought about what amal they can make over time? What can bring better rewards..but the problem is we still do not confident (yakin), we are only believe (percaya). An example is that when one take a expensive phone to a 3-storey building and drop it, what would people say? "You crazy, its an expensive phone~!" might be the comment of a person seeing you doing that. But know that we still did not value our amal that much. Semua orang tahu nilai harta.,but do we value amal after hearing the rewards, the benefits? Still we do not "yakin" and appreciate the virtues of amal. Thats why we are lacking of amal.

Another thing the scholar added was that "When you make amal, try to practice until you can do for longer time span. The lacking of amal because we don't have the determination and passion, but know that the secret lies within the time you spend. We only spend a little time, that's when we become dispassionate. When you try to prolong it, its where the tranquility are.

All in all, he added that always make intention to do more, before the time's no more for us..We are indeed weak, ask from Almighty Allah to strengthen us and all our fellow Muslims.

Until next time~~~

Salam

Travel~!

2010-03-24T20:15:00.000-07:00

Salam~

Today I want to share that I lost a number of certificates..its not good since I'll be graduating in 2 months..May Allah give me patience on what happened~ :-(

However today I'm writing for sharing my opinion on travel..I had like travelling..all the better on bike. Before this, I never recorded my journeys around..Afterwards I'll be sharing my travel journey.. :-) A journey to view the world around me, to understand what is there to be done.

It has to be done. If I just stay here, no..no, I will not see the world as it is and would only be subjected to the news circulating around, which I dont really trust on certain things. I will uncover things as there are and leave you to judge it and give me some feedback. May Allah gave me strength to tour and unravel the happenings around me and let my journeys be a good source of lessons to all~

Until next time~
Salam :-)

Look Beyond Our Footprints~

2010-03-16T18:39:00.000-07:00

Salam...good day~

Alhamdulillah..Havent been writing for quite sometime..not that I'm busy, but lack of the energy to write..

I just recovered from certain sickness, praise to Allah that lifted me from the effects recently. Now on the edge of finishing my studies, I dont know how will I be writing afterwards..

For today..It has come to my senses, what people are doing around me are confusing. Not that I'm losing myself..but I did notice certain things, and observed afterwards..and came to a conclusion:-

A Muslim..should refrain oneself from crossing the borders..Allah's borders..I see that in the flow of social life around, one think that it is commonly accepted here. I know here that the urge is there, I am also subjected to these matters..but patience..what we think is good can be bad for us..One can even be blinded with the so-called "common practice" until we all cannot judge anymore what is right and what is wrong..that's where the crossing of borders happened..

Why does that happened? In conclusion I think (my thoughts) its all because less spending time in the path of Allah..too long immersing oneself in worldly matters until they became part of our own life..and when it had assimilated, one cannot see what is allowed and what is forbidden by Allah.

A reminder, mainly for me..and also for all my friends..We must constantly seek forgiveness and hidayah from Allah, and that may Allah guide us to the right path, and maintain us until the end of our lives~

Baliklah kepada asal~

2010-02-22T02:17:00.000-08:00

Salam~

Good day to all readers..may Allah bless us all..

Percutian lalu, sempena Tahun Baru Cina 2010 kali ini telah memberikanku sedikit sebanyak pengajaran. Bukannya selama ini tiada pengajaran atau diriku ini buta, tetapi peningkatan umur dan pengalaman telah menyedarkan aku..

Bagaimana mahu bermula..hmm, beginilah..tatkala usia pengajianku bak di hujung penjuru (around the corner)..aku tidak lagi merasakan kepulangan sebagai anak yang merantau jauh mencari ilmu,bersemangat tinggi, yang setiap kali pulang mahu bergembira tanpa sebarang duka..tetapi seolah2 semua itu bukan lagi diriku. Beberapa kepulangan sebelum ini telah mula memberikan petanda bahawa masanya telah tiba, untuk aku mengembangkan hidup aku dan mula berdikari. Kini sudahpun mencecah 23 tahun, semakin kerap pula aku mula berfikir bagaimana nanti ketika aku akan mula bekerjaya (InsyaAllah), bagaimana keadaan keluargaku, adik2ku..adakah semakin lama nanti aku akan mula "berjarak" sedikit demi sedikit. Walaupun belum masanya, tetapi raut wajah orang tuaku mula menandakan tanggungjawab baru akan bermula tak lama lagi. Waktu mudaku akan mula hilang, tanggungjawabku akan mula bertambah, kehendak agama semakin banyak..bagaimana pula dengan persiapan diri yang tidak seberapa ini.

Daku mula berfikir, betapa jauh juga berbeza diri ini dengan diriku yang dulu.. Saat bersekolah, saat mula menjejakkan kaki ke universiti. Bagaimana pengalaman mematangkan diri, pengajaran diterima walaupun pahit..dan berkongsi suka duka bersama teman di sini. Tetapi, baru diriku sedar perubahan jiwa..Kalau dahulu aku hanya mahu merasa bagaimana kehidupan di kawasan yang "maju"..Perasaan dan persekitaran ketika tinggal di "bandar2 besar"..Rupanya banyak yang telah aku gadaikan, yang telah aku lupakan sepanjang pengajian di sini. Baru aku sedar adab2ku telah banyak yang hilang, betapa bertambahnya cakap kosongku..begitu juga betapa bertambahnya angan2ku..keadaan persekitaran di sini yang membentuk jiwa aku yang selama ini secara halus..Kerana kelemahan diri aku juga~

Bila kukenang semula..aku sedar lebih baik aku KEMBALI PADA ASAL.. saat aku tidak punya angan2 yang banyak, saat di mana aku tidak menggadaikan adab dan budaya sopan, ya aku mengakui di sini juga aku seperti kata orang kampung: "Duduk bandar lama2, begitulah jadinya".

Aku mahu kembali..aku mahu berhenti berangan lagi..daku hanya mahu kembali kepada anak kampung yang dulunya hanya mahu membentuk atau sekurang2nya menjadi mangkin kehidupan yang lebih baik di tempatku, tanpa berbagai2 perasaan yang tidak baik yang kupelajari hanya di sini. Seolah2 aku telah "menggapai lebih dari apa yang aku patut capai"..Aku mahu berhenti menggapai..Daku lebih selesa tinggal dan hidup seperti orang biasa, yang tidak dikenali sesiapa..Walau tinggal di kampung juga xmengapa..asal aku dapat kembali dan menjadi orang yang berbudi kepada orang tuaku dan keluargaku, sudah cukup bagiku.

Nanti akan kucari jalan pulang ke kehidupan itu, akan aku lupakan budaya hidup di sini yang banyak mencorakkan bentuk jiwaku yang tidak baik ini.

~Ya Allah hilangkanlah sifat2 mazmumah diriku..dan jadikanlah aku di kalangan orang yang Engkau redhai..Cukuplah Engkau sebagai penolongku, yang memberiku kekuatan sepanjang hayatku~

P/s: Aku mahu menghargai adab sopan dan budi bahasa yang tinggi..seperti nasihat2 yang ditinggalkan dalam filem P.Ramlee. :-)

Changes and Improvements? InsyaAllah~

2010-02-01T12:04:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Been preoccupied with many matters, now I can find some spare time to write..

Today is a "sharing is caring"day for me, for swaping stories give you many things and experiences. It started with stories of the old school days, which were happily shared with my roommate. Up to the extent that what changes people over time, we came to many different conclusions. A certain factor came through the long discussion, and but before that there is a need to enlighten all reading this: "That this is based on my own thoughts and if you have a comments/different opinions, do share."

People changes over time, yes people do. We all grow, become older and older over time, becoming more experienced. As a friend of mine stated, "what really matters is the purpose of changing or improve". One can change because of loved ones, a "dark" moment@past, no real options or even for the greater good. Definitely I am bringing a thought, but do note no offense is intended.

I could wonder for a long time, thinking about changes happening around me and that I tried to figure out and discussed with others about my thoughts. Stories of the "point-of-turn" might be different for each and every of us, we are unique in our own ways. An example of the turning point is like a person who wanted to change his way of life that had cause him/her social life. I did, noticed the turning point varies among people but to change for better, to turn to Allah, as a Muslim should be of immediate concern.

One can say, "I am already good" or "I am satisfied with what I am"...do note, that never should one be satisfied or "rasa senang' with one's current condition. A person should always have the will to change and improve, as Allah s.w.t is the one we can make "doa" and ask to make us better. When people nowadays keep on focusing to improve more and more worldly things around, answer me:

"What preparations for the afterlife have I prepared? Is it enough? Will Allah accept me when its time?"

Come to think that in the hustle and bustle of this life, we must not get carried away by the worldly changes until we forget and abandoned the real purpose of this life...and far worse if Allah s.w.t closes one's heart (May Allah save us)

For me, out of all the changes, choose to turn to Allah and improve our relationship over time with Him, the most merciful and most Kind. And also, do make prayers to Allah to give taufiq and hidayah to fellow Muslims..

Note that, I believe there's always room for changes. Allah is the All-Hearing and the One and only that can guide us.

Wahai Allah,

Ampun dosa2 kami, dosa2 umat ini,

Yang kami lakukan sedar atau xsedar,

Kami selalu menzalimi diri sendiri,

Tunjukkan kami ke jalan yg lurus,

dan kekalkan kami atas jalan hidayatMu,

Sungguh kami akan kembali pada Engkau~

That Lesson and This Writing~

2010-01-18T21:32:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Here I am again, writing to all dear readers..Wishing all that Allah ease the daily chores..

I was in a majlis, an event in a nearby UPM mosque last Sunday..that a elder brother gave us some good lessons. Around 250++ people were there, and ended around 10 pm. The speaker left us with many invaluable lessons for a Muslim life.Among his words were:-

"The Prophet p.b.u.h had put effort for 13 years in putting the faith in his companion (Sahabah r.ahum)..and the purpose of such lengthy act is to ensure his companions will have each of their heart ready, not just their mind. Islam is not in the mind, but it is in the heart..When you are Muslim, it mustn't be just in your mind..its the heart that counts. When religion is only in the mind, believe in me, that's where the problems come, that's when you cannot maintain your efforts.We must also make efforts that Islam is deeply rooted in our hearts, because when the heart is good, the rest of the person shall insyaAllah also be good....~" and so on..

That is just a part of what I can convey to you now..It's prayer time at this time..so I'll be going and write again later.

Salam~

To wonder and ponder~

2010-01-14T00:08:00.000-08:00

If only I do reach the truth,

Never shall I sit here now,

Of many wonders and creation standing,

For I shall reap and sought the lessons around.

Ponder the world and all that resides within it,

Observe carefully as one is able and see,

The lovely creations, every single comes with a purpose,

From the one and only Creator, forever can never be challenged.

The blue sky, green trees and the white clouds,

Such vastness exhibited, as so the diversity reflected,

The creations for humanity served their purpose,

Only its lessons are for those who's constantly in search.

(Written today online at 4.08pm)

A question of sincerity,and why is that~

2010-01-11T19:52:00.000-08:00

Salam..long time no scribbling here..wishing all, close or far, for eternal happiness.

Recently, I felt it was just a feeling, but remembering its been times this question of sincerity, tentang mengikhlaskan diri kerana Allah..indeed keeps cycling around this head of mine. Who can say that he is already sincere (ikhlas)? A scholar once said that "When you are already sincere, neither praises nor bad mouths have an effect on a you." Then, come to think that if a person praises you on something good, or even talk to you badly on an amal, what are OUR feelings that time?

I went to seek a friend yesterday, and brought questions in need of immediate answer.. "How is that we can move towards pure sincerity to Allah? " There's this "ujub", and this feeling of proud when one praises us..and that why is one can do ibadah but with less feelings of worshipping?"

And the reply that he gave me was:-

"Be consistent (istiqamah) in amal, and that shall keep you from feeling so. Try to be consistent, force yourself if you need to do so, because sincerity is the last thing to come in an amal. It dissolves even with the slightest feeling of proud,or by bragging even a little of doing this amal, doing that amal..Ikhlas ini kena lihat sebelum,semasa dan selepas sesuatu amal, keep it in check..istighfarlah sekiranya niat berubah pada mana2 bahagian amal kamu."

It became clear that consistency is the solution which thy seeketh..and it was a good feeling to know what to do later. And so, that is something I want to share with you..and i am afraid its time to go away again..Hey, no worries..I'll be writing again sooner..my prayers are for all.

Until next time..

Salam~

A common day,common practices & a reunion?

2010-01-06T01:49:00.000-08:00

Salam..A good day be my wish to all.

Its the second week already. Just recently back from my beloved house..my own private place of peace. I'd managed to fully forget the matters back in campus, and spending much time with me family. Like I am already feeling home, and not going back after all. But the truth is that, one day or another..I am on my own, the usual be-it-yourself sob and go-with-the-flow type.

The memory of coming back suddenly made me afraid of the tasks awaiting, may Allah strengthen me in these times of striving. Upon getting in the bus to come back here, I told my father that this is my time to accomplish something, and that things are going to be hardest upon arriving..I asked him to pray for me, so that all be better over time. It was that time he told me to brace myself, and to keep mindful not to ever leave the solah and the Quran everyday. Really, the words that he spoked made I felt like crying inside out..and made sure that I am holding my side of his trust to me.

Anyway, there's the delay..bus got damaged on the way back, and we had to wait for 3 hours ++ before another bus, a replacement I think that got lost in finding us.Finally back in campus, its been some common days of classes with the usual come and go.

Back here, today I met a Masters student, which actually was among my neighbours years ago..been here during my practical time, did see me a few times but didnt speak to me before,only that today she finally asked me "Assalamualaikum.Ini Sobri ke? Yang duduk kat Shahab Perdana, Alor Star tu? Ingat x sapa ni?"

Oh I did, remember the days, the early days where I went to play at their house. We exchanged pleasantries, and exchange stories for a while.. But then, we couldnt continue to share stories, my class is due. I shall, if Allah wills so..tell my family on this matter, that I'd met the supposed-to-be-long-gone neighbours. This neighbour of mine moved out years ago, but they'd remembered us..such memories. Like an old story that came alive again. Such events, really are not predictable. :-)

So, that's all for now..Will write again later. Salam. My prayers are to all~

Until next time~

Its Time~

2009-12-16T17:19:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Its nearing, my soul can hear it. The end of a journey, insyaAllah continued by another. Advancing sometimes seem to be good, but the drawback is that you might lose your focus if its done too fast. My projects are doing good, next semester is just around the corner while not forgettting my age also. :-

Planning on going home this 22th December, I wonder how long can I return as a student..and when will be the first time I shall return victorious from these 4 years? Its amazing how through these 4 years Allah brought me up to who I am today. At times I even dreamt of what happened during these years, the memories..sometimes joyful,sometimes...............painful.

However, we all knew..that everything that has a beginning has an end. In a few months there'll be the end of this level of study, and we all be away. It will all fade away, but I refuse to end up just like that. Planning to advance to another level after careful thinking, may Allah aid us, and provide the best way which we can safely trod in.

So, it wont be long before the finale..prep up your gears,and march to the frontlines! May this be the most glorious days for the years to come!

A good night~

2009-12-12T10:09:00.000-08:00

"Tatkala mentari terbenam, serentak itu bulan menjelang,

Bintang-bintang mula bersinaran, bersaksikan malam,

Menyusupnya ketenangan, mengakhiri penantian,

Menjanjikan keamanan, menamatkan keresahan"

I am sharing today that tonight is a very special night..I am feeling so calm, the air is so fresh and the night is full of serenity. Such nights, makes me feel enlightened.

I wonder if I can share this calm feeling to all, but the poem above describes all. It is a gift from Allah, and a very wonderful one..may one can feel His greatness in His creations.

Words are meaningful~

2009-12-05T17:49:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Its morning here the time I wrote this..and I wish you all a fine morning. Recently nearly having a fever, praise to Allah that prevented there was no fever for me,yet. I can still write, and I can still share with you,that's more than good.

I wish to share something to you,dear readers. To learn something, spend some time on it. True,and anything learnt should be shared..even though some lessons are rough and unacceptable if thought logically.One of the lessons I named it "the lesson of words". Our words meant a lot even to ourselves, and as to how we kept and control the words before they are being muttered define oneself. We are still in control of our words if they are unsaid yet, but once the words are uttered, you are out of control. The words of the tongue could be sharper than a sword, as the consequences would be unimaginable.

Why did I state here that words meant much even to yourself? Your words shall lead to the soul, if the words are bad, you are treating your soul unwisely. Say only good, meaningful words and your soul shall be imprinted with goodness.A Muslim scholar once recorded to have said that before he went to sleep each night,he trained himself to remember the words he spoken earlier that day. He then would identify which words are not supposed to be said, and remind himself not to said them again the other day.

So again..before saying something,do control the words and only speak if there is a need. Cut off unnescessary words and refrain from spending more time with people who are too talkative. Spend more time with learnt people, observe how they speak and react to speeches around and trust me, there's so much to learn. Maybe some people would disagree with me but know this,you will learn the reason behind these words:

"If talking can be imagined as silver, then being silent is gold"

Trust me :-)

Salam~

It's meditation time!

2009-12-03T20:52:00.000-08:00

Salam...good afternoon to you lot.

A fine day today, so cold that I even got a flu today. No worries, not H1N1. Holidays started for the common people, and the time is ripe for relaxing oneself. Me and my mates been resting too, a tiring semester it has been. Recently just got back from Aidiladha holidays, there are much to share with all of you. Stories of escaped cows, endless sacrifices in days will be a good reflection of how relaxing it has been.

However, one must not ponder too much that he or she be at ease, It's a good time to learn or teach something. Lately I have been reading on emotional intelligence and some relationship books that are worth to be shared with. Later I post and share what I can. Hmm, and its nearing Jumaat prayer time now..so I guess I'll be going for now

Until next time..

Salam~

Crushing the opposition!

2009-11-22T19:18:00.000-08:00

Salam..

The title do not reflect to any of you, but for my inner self. Perasaan malas mula menjelma slps tamat Product Launching day. I dont know, but I am loosing slowly..Its been so, then I'll have to kick anything distracting from my options. So, decisions are being made bottom-up, and my project is already being conducted
Until next time~

Epilogue & Prologue of Mine

2009-11-21T15:47:00.000-08:00

Salam..

Morning to everyone, it is a fine morning here. The 37th Slackers moved out already, staying in Bandar Seri Putra for this holiday for the purpose of FYP. It did give some old memories when we first stayed here, ehe..such memories..We' ll be here until January, hope many good things are in store for us :-)

Enough about that.So,out here today..I wish to announce our Product Launching Day was held on the 18th November 2009, at the Faculty of Food Science & Technology. It was an event of such, not too bold to say that it left us with good experiences. Out here too, I wish to express my gratitude to my group members.Its been inspiring with all of you around,that supported me in times of need.

You gave me hope when there is none,

You keep it up when others go down.

Thank you all for relentless cooperation and very undying commitment to get it done. Your sacrifices made all our efforts worth it. I am lining out your names here as a total appreciation:-

Lau Hooi Ping

Noor Hidayah Mohd Isa
Low Chen Ney
Farhana Yusof
Goh Chun Foong
Syafika Rahmat
Aswani Ayub
Noranida Adam
Naemah Abd Aziz

"A grand prize to all of you"

Sincerely,

MOHD SOBRI

Back in The Field~

2009-11-08T23:51:00.000-08:00

Salam..

A very good afternoon to you lot. Actually, i dun want to take exam today, i wanna stay home,but..hmmm seems like it was worth it. Praise to Allah, God of heaven and earth where all seek guidance from, that aided me.

It a brand new day for me, promising new hopes, hopefully for all of u too. In another two weeks, we are having "Raya Haji" or Eid al-Adha. Its good for having such celebration as a remembrance to Allah. The stories of sacrifices of the prophet Ibrahim (Abraham) and also for the pilgrims heading towards the Holy Lands (Mecca) for the Hajj. My father's younger brother (Pak Lang) shall insyaAllah be there too, and my prayers are to all that Allah aid the pilgrims' journey.

So until next time, need to "conquer a few more lands".

"The Dying Wish" (Originally :Upon My End)

2009-11-04T20:32:00.000-08:00

As the words are being lettered,

Things already dissolving and fading,

For the cracking hourglass of my life,

Nearing its end, with so little grains left.

Yet there are still unfinished matters,

As akin as unfurnished furniture,

Of the once bustling life of mine,

That shall now forever long gone,

No more attuned with me,

Neither shall suit that little necropolis of mine.

Still there’s hope for those still breathing,

To continue the wills from the dead,

And to bear the visions of the living,

Promising there’ll be eternal rest for me,

From all the saddles that was left behind.

The last of my conscious is fading away,

My visions blurred, my breathing slowed,

Revealing me it’s my time to go away,

Stamping my miseries without delay,

Forgetting all, memorized by none,

Whilst your debt shall then be paid,

May them fairer than me all ways.

The Words of My Soul~

2009-11-04T18:58:00.000-08:00

Salam..

A very good morning I wish you all today..with a very concerned heart. A strong wind came bringing some great inner challenges, praise to Allah none get past my rationality. It'd sometimes tuned my mood, tried to strike me down but I managed to stand. It seems that in time, many things could change but I didnt know so much in this little time permitted. Relationships turned bad, or better..things didnt turned out as we planned and ignorance of the true matter that lies ahead all confuses me, but I believe whatever is happening around, I hope that all will bring the best lessons and train me with patience.

Careful I must, so that my concentration for the time given would not be wasted..And I have a wish that whoever is reading this, pray for all of us the best of life. I am a young man, too foolish to be wise but not that foolish to be ignoring anything happening.I have feelings, I have moods, I have specific behaviours too. Maybe I am 2,3 years back of my actual age but I am learning with the thought of all my surroundings, and things happening shall provide me with precious lessons.

I do not know all of u that thoroughly, that I am no perfect, and I am not that wise. But know that I seek forgiveness from all, I learn to forgive for that Allah is The All-forgiving..I do have many, bad perceptions but all I must turn into good ones.

Enough about what I felt..Actually I finished writing a poem with a planned title of "Upon My End". But didnt bring it with me now, so couldnt write here yet..

So...Until Next time.
"The Time is Ripe"

A Cat and A Good LEsson

2009-11-03T00:24:00.000-08:00

Salam..The story, shall be conveyed upon..

It was..no,it "is" a cat..if "was" the cat would had already died..And that this certain orange cat, had been around my floor from this early september. It started with so cute, so beautiful yet so adorable..making people all amused with the cat so much. I myself had stopped and taken the cat to my room to play and fill my time with it. It has been the center of attention that time, alluring all. UNTIL..

The cute cat dissappeared two weeks ago and reappeared a few days ago.Unfortunately with a life-changing look. Why did I said that, is because the cat lost function of one of its legs(capik), measles and all dirty..not that adorable anymore. It appeared as a cat who'd gone to war and forever changed, and I did not noticed why it had been here again with such looks. People no longer love to play and feed the cat anymore, they dont want to have the cat enter their room anymore. Some even chased away the once lovely cat.But the cat still stayed around for a few days more be4 no longer be seen..At first glance, I did not notice anything, but after the cat is gone..know I did what lesson it gave me.

That:
The cat, which is so adorable, cute is like this temporary world..when its new, its beautiful..everyone likes. All people put efforts in getting such..

And that the dirty, handicapped cat, actually a resemblance of a no-more fame, no more beauty..no one would want to approach such..all will put efforts in avoiding so..

BEgitulah..semasa cantiknya, semua org mahukannya..tetapi bila masa berlalu..tiada yg kekal..semuanya akn layu dn akhirnya akn disepak2 semahu2nya,dibuang sejauhnya..
Ambilllah iktibar bahawa harta, rupa dn masa kita akan hilang dari kita..seperti pengajaran dari si kucing itu..

So until next time. The time is right~

Leaves of autumn~

2009-10-28T18:13:00.000-07:00

Salam..today signalled the first of one week rest for this soul of mine..Its been days with hardship and lack of rest, yet countering the urge to oversleep is still undone.Actually, when one already awaken..shouldnt be sleeping anymore when it comes to sunrise, right? Wake up when its Fajr. Finished with the last day of my task to monitor Product Development work, now I can have a nice rest, a decent meal and wah, a good night's sleep.

Been planning to go home this weekend until 7th Nov. My family, wait ya? I'll be joining the making of home-grown Roselle cordial there..nak minum! Right now finishing the last assignment this week, and then InsyaAllah I'll be home.

Also, for this tranquil time, is actually a period of autumn, where the winter if Allah wills shall come afterwards. A period where one shouldnt let one own's guard down. Always do proper things and prepare for anything to fill such time like this, rather than just sitting down doing nothing. Help a friend in need, learn new things, take time to think of lessons Allah gave around us. Our lives can be very meaningful..InsyaAllah~

Also, one thing I observed last week left a good lesson, I shall share it in my next post.

A Good Headstart and A Change of Heart~

2009-10-26T19:27:00.000-07:00

Salam..

Here come the hard times..Bit and bit polishing my own mind, for the purpose of examination. Praise to Allah, one very good thing is that I just recently successful in blasting my way through 2 exams already, hopefully this good start means a good end too.

I wish to share something with all of you. I woke up one day, earlier in the morning and feeling bad about myself. It took me more than a few minutes to realize what's causing the disturbance. Having identified, I do know what was wrong. It all started with an advice of a companion one night before, more than a usual friend or even a best friend. It went straight to the heart.With aid from Allah, I came to be able to see..what was that disturbance that I woke up with, its the feeling of guilty. Its been flunctuating to make a decision..even at times I am with no proper standing, such embarassment..and it originated from a battered heart. Now its solidifying, no more regrets and upsets as much more important matters than my bad feelings.

So, enough for now~

-Gearing up myself again for the Product Development and warming up for my next paper-

Until next time~
Until the TIME IS RIGHT, now nearing~

Tense Build-up

2009-10-22T19:02:00.000-07:00

Salam..its..its taking all my time away,no..not actually..if not I wouldnt be writing this..Exam's next week, and much more needed to keep the heat up. And so the call, the urge to visit my home sweet home.I wanted to, but there's all these things keep coming up, where does that leave my holiday? Thought would be having one but no, its no more long holidays. I'm already 22 years old, should be no trouble leaving home for a long time.But.............How I wanted to be at home this time, be with my family and the little "ninjas" waiting for a good snacking from their uncle..hehe. Do wait for me..

Thinking of getting home this 3rd NOV for 5 days. Collecting all my last strength and putting all in just two hour or slightly longer exam bothers me..Its like plz, can we have no exams?But that wouldnt do..Me, and all of you college students reading this should be arming yourselves for the coming responsibility. "Failure is not an option, but whenever it happens..we should learn the lesson".

Hmm, my stomach's growling..need some food.InsyaAllah be writing again later. All the best, and for my sis,Munirah reading this.."Kirim salam sama semua di sana, and tell them I'll be back in 3rd Nov".

Until next time~
Until THE TIME IS RIGHT~

Tides of Challenges~

2009-10-20T18:31:00.000-07:00

Salam and a very good morning..

I havent been writing for so long, neither I know what all around me been thinking.It is a time of what-so-called meditation, I cannot write but after a while only..and now I am back.

Things are somewhat fast-paced. I even do not have time for my own self. Maybe its this period of spending study times while increasing responsibilities are causing this. It is the times of challlenges. By next week we would InsyaAllah already be facing the exampapers, oo I really want to face them..come on, come on. I'll seek Allah's guidance and pray for all with good intentions.To all, best wishes and may a great triumph be with us.

Enough about exams, lets talk the "lighter" things.. We in UPM here will be heldling FPD Launcing Day this coming 18th November 2009. Here today I am inviting fellow colleagues to attend this meaningful event..come, come..we'll wait for u.

The 37th Slackerboys will be moving out this semester holiday, to Bandar Seri Putra again. "Welcome back, boys" is what we wish when we arrived. I remember of the days there, the community life is very good and worth of being mentioned here. And that the ukhuwwah between Muslims there are good, we are deeply impressed and decided for another stay there.
So this is all I could write now, and I hope it will not be long until I am writing again.
Curing myself is within Allah's will, and I hope my soul will be at ease over time.

Until next time~
Until THE TIME IS RIGHT~

"To End The Wounds of The Past"

2009-09-01T02:38:00.000-07:00

"Soul in Joy"

2009-08-28T01:37:00.000-07:00

There are times where one could tell,

Of the many facial expressions today,

If I were the one you've come to seek,

For it is real joy one could feel.

Warmth of smiles filled my days,

From the day I've fixed my feelings & decided it to stay,

Suited together in all kinds of play,

And yet not leaving in times of sway.

Apples are sweet, limes are better,

But none could be much more fairer,

Clearing my day and lighting my nights,

With the lights of million stars that shines out with delight.

Delight is just one that I could say,

Much more would'nt suit better ways,

For words will never feel what the joy says,

That given me happiness and strength for all my days.

(Actual date written-24th June 2009)

UNTIL NEXT TIME~

UNTIL THE TIME IS RIGHT~

Its Not Fancy~

2009-08-24T23:26:00.000-07:00

Salam..its just another day and I am writing again..All are going good here, hoping so for all of u readers out there. Things will get hot with the coming of 3 in a row tests for 37th Slackers this week, may Allah aid us. All in all, this holy Ramadhan is very calm and soothing.Its never been like this all this year round, and I am really feeling good. Its like all my works and responsibilities becoming easier and lighter.

This has been a great help to my mind..(Hoped and prayed for all,too). There's much to think and to analyze this life, figuring out what 's the truth, what's the deceptions behind many things. Alhamdulillah, I will use this soothing environment and serenity from Him in probing this life better. Knowing what to touch,what not to be involved with, what is of immediate interest and what's not. I like to think that way, for this world has no limits in terms of what people could learn from. "Banyak pengajaran hatta sekecil2 perkara yg berlaku jika difikirkan berkali2, pasti dan pasti ada pengajaran dan hikmah baru". Trust me, there will be always valuable experiences for those who use all their senses to learn and improve themselves towards Allah, for the greater good.

Dear all, I would like to share one thing I noted. Recently I have been reading on some writings on Islam. I found out some were in fancy form. Its not the right way of speaking the truth when we talk or write about religious matters, when its being done as fancy as it could. We could never reflect the whole matter in concern when its fancy. I'll give all an example. It resembles a person who knows the sweet taste of a colorful fruit, and learnt to love it, but when trying to share with people the person gave the same,colorful fruit but with a bland taste. We might think for the purpose of attracting people, but know that, when we fancy the teachings, its like merendahkan ketinggian agama. Its not hikmah when we think so. "Semoga ada pengajaran utk saya dn semua yg mmbaca"~

So this'll be the end for now, I'll be writing later.

UNTIL NEXT TIME~

UNTIL THE TIME IS RIGHT~

Gearing up for the upcoming~

2009-08-24T02:21:00.000-07:00

It's the 7th week...if u ask me what week is this now?

Its seems like the time allocated for me would be insufficient..

The burdens and responsibilities here have been causing great deals on me..

But I do know, that I would be supported by my friends here and there..

and everytime I remember that, I'll be standing back in no time..

It seems that this is a busy semester, no more fancy things..no more unattended matters..things are moving forward, and if any of you or me got left behind.. There'll be no excuses..Be wanting to do so many things at once, and got caught in the middle because of wanting so much perfection on everything..

However, there is much to be done here and I'd rather start now,

so..thats all for this time,InsyaAllah be writing more next time..

UNTIL NEXT TIME~

UNTIL THE TIME IS RIGHT~

A Remembrance of My Place of Peace

2009-08-18T19:05:00.000-07:00

Salam~

Its nearing Ramadhan as each day passed, and by the end of this week..Moslems shall start one of the pillars of Islam, fasting during the month of Ramadhan. It is along wait, finally just around the corner. The month which good deeds and virtues (amal) are multiplicated, where Allah's watch over us with blessings, for He is the most Merciful and most kind of all.

I remember the early days when I learnt about fasting. Its all just about not eating, and at that time..kids (years ago) like me during Ramadhan never end it at the proper time. People call it "puasa sekerat hari". Reminds of my early days, when whole families fast together, go to terawih prayers and prepare for the next day. Oh again I am longing to go home. And as a reminder to go home this week, I am sharing these pictures during my last holiday and also for u people reading this. InsyaAllah I 'll be heading home for this weekend.

Until next time...

Until the time is right...~

Yours truly,

-Sobri-

Killing my own heart~

2009-08-12T00:41:00.000-07:00

Days have passed..I dont know what's happenning around.Being occupied the whole week and did not even have enough rest. But the will of longevity is here..Apparently every time my spirit went down because of my troubled feelings, I am saved. I never got that downed until my work and my tasks are affected. Its all from Allah..Alhamdulillah. Constantly battling with my these undead feelings, I know I should not let it way against the truth..Its being done at the cost of killing my own feelings. Its kinda hard when you are on your own..its my own battle..Its like this all this time, I think..Sometimes I am thinking that I might not be the same person if I continue on like this..But it has to be done. No worries, to all who read this.The change is for good.My family prayed for me, my friends prayed for me..but know that I appreciate all of you.

My life will once again be back to normal, although only my character would changed..memories shall never be erased..but I am brimming to fulfill my life..to whatever it takes me. To friends out there..do your best, my prayers are for all of us..

Passing judgement to my own self..

The sword of light will once again be drawn..

In pursue of the time borrowed upon..

Before the all be consumed away..

For the one and only sole reason..

I locked my heart and my story..

So says a person who looks downcast..

UNTIL NEXT TIME~

UNTIL THE TIME IS RIGHT~

Its Complicated

2009-08-04T22:08:00.000-07:00

I am writing this today to apologize for being unable to update my blog as promised..err,but i'll try again this late afternoon..Quite busy now..over and out

Finally~ Some Rest

2009-08-03T06:48:00.000-07:00

Here I am...after the great exodus that took place at UPM.

Hmm..It was a once in a lifetime, I think..that one would be in that kind of situation.Almost everyone panicked and started packing after the order was giving to clear the bunkers and head to the shelters.So I did,went to buy my ticket..and finally my journey ended me at my home sweet home..after craving to go home for so long (Alhamdulillah). It was such a thrilling sight,seeing my father..with his C70 cycle picked me from the bus station. I am so thankful, and should serve my family with all I got..like a saying goes "Small arms,big heart". The smell and surroundings here,calms the heart and the bearer..and soothes the troubled feelings that always came by at times.

Guess what, the herds (goats,I mean) have doubled and there are new vegetables planted..and the greatest..newly renovated musolla..the sacred place of worship for Moslems here. Its a great change..and I am ready to continue the good changes with all I can.

Days passed, moods cherished,

Always awaited, forever wanted.

So my holidays went on very good. I am relieved of my heavy duty there (UPM) and even got a few fishing trips, emhm~ so many catches here..I love it here.

But now my holidays nearly came to an end.. tomorrow I will be taking a bus trip back to continue on my studies.Hopefully my battery will be fully recharged upon arriving. Hmmm..and time is running short here, and I will add new post tomorrow, with a poem (InsyaAllah) that I wanted to share with all of u readers out there.

Until tomorrow,salam and good night~

The Fallen Sob

2009-07-23T20:42:00.000-07:00

This week..Allah had given me sickness. Its quite something but I still managed to follow up my classes..Until yesterday, I met my personal advisor (PA) and when she was giving me my project title, she made it clearly that I'm in no good condition. Then what happened was she "ordered" me to go and screen myself that I am free of anything short of H1n1. Owh,that's something..And I knew that she was influenced to do so because her daughter was sent back home from UiTM as for the cases there (did u people know it too?).

So it made me feel bad..I wonder "What if its me the reason UPM was to be closed or worst, quarantined?" and I decided to go and made sure everything was ok. Upon arriving, bah..there's so many people wearing masks,coughing and sneezing,its like a camp full of H1N1 victims (although only suspects,actually :-) ). Just entered, a nurse gave me the face mask..and it made me felt "No..!! Am I infected too?". I had to go to the counter to screen myself, carefully and truthfully answering every question asked. And because I lacked of one last characteristics of H1N1, <> the nurse said it might not be H1N1 after all.And so I waited like ordinary person at the PK.

U know what happened next?The doctor told me its not H1N1..God, I am sooo relieved at the thought of that. But the drawback it that he told me I am lacked of rest and was to relieve myself the whole day. Hmmm and finally I was out of there in no time, after being issued with so many medicines.

This is a week of something, since so many things happened. By the way, its more than just plain memories left..I had to live on, there are many more experiences waiting to be mine.

"May Allah always aid us, whenever and wherever we are"

-UNTIL NEXT TIME-

New Week? YES!

2009-07-19T18:46:00.000-07:00

This week starts with a broad smile and an open hand for everything..This spells "GOOOOD" and I am ready to take whatever coming this week. My project is to be given within this week, and I am eagerly waiting to start doing it.

Everyone,on your feet..! There should be no rest until all works are finished.."STRUGGLE TIME"

"Undying Spirit"

2009-07-15T00:17:00.000-07:00

Today, i will share what I have been feeling all this while~

My day started passively, in a way a lazy person starts. It was a feeling of wanting to do nothing but just stare at the window and wandering for nothing. It was simply a feeling of being deserted, being left behind. I felt this was caused by recent events, that tested my patience and decision making,may Allah aid me. But I do know..I shouldnt feel so..I am a student of knowledge, shouldnt be acting or even think of doing that.

It reminded me, of another advice from one scholar,of last week event..saying that learners of the holy book, al-Quran..should note that with it we learn of wisdom and not emotions. We must not put emotions in front of wisdom. Remembering that, put me straight back in the the line. I know there are feelings, troubled feelings that are not right..and I should learn to accept matters already happened and should plan better,may Allah aid me.

As time passes by, somehow praise to Allah..I just suddenly up the front line again..I ve gained my spirit back,my hope of redemption..and hopefully it'll last. I think I already gained enough strength of letting go too, as one person..that I really care told me.

"May our prayers be answered with God's aid"

Until next time~

"A Life-Long Lesson"

2009-07-13T17:28:00.000-07:00

It was the end of last week, did I came back from one journey, and I would like to share what I can with all reading this.

The journey was a glimse of true brotherhood and Allah s.w.t had given me much to learn.
We, went there as students, learning all we can during that time. There were gathering of scholars, foreigners, VIPs, civilians, and also students.

As students, we are to listen and learn from the elders there.
One, Prof. Abdul Rahman, said:-

"Moslem students will initiate changes in the world (Allah willing), as students will be spread out throughout the world and bear the responsibility as representatives of Islam."

Also, he left three advices to students:-
"Students should follow these three things as your responsibility as a Moslem, first, pay professional dedication to your studies. Secondly, pay respect to your parents and teachers, no matter they are Moslem or not. Third and the last, obey your institution rules, we are represntative of Islam, world-wide."

Then, other scholars had left us also with food for thoughts, hereby I listed some for all of us....
One of them clarified what is sabar (patience) and what is syukur (graceful):-

"Apa itu sabar? Sabar ini bukan bila dipukul, lalu sabar dn x buat apa2, sabar ini menahan diri dari perkara2 yg dilarang Allah"

"Apa itu syukur? Syukur bukan bila Allah s.w.t beri nikmat dn kita sebut 'aku bersyukur kepada Allah', this is not syukur. Syukur ini ialah menggunakan nikmat Allah, apa yg Allah beri, dengan cara yg diredhaiNya"

(I will add others later, its time for class,until next time)

The End of an Era~ (Goodbye MPOB)

2009-06-26T19:48:00.000-07:00

After action report of 26th JUne 2009
Its a long time after my last post, being lazy and busy and the same time,
unable to think for a while...on what to write,what to convey..

This week..signals the end of an era, an era of which I shall remember always, as I called it "The 6 month of Truth". This week..we ended our long journey of being a student at Malaysian Palm Oil Board. And I would like to share many things with those who read this.

I was just, a mere student out of college to embark on a quest of learning. Not knowing what's in store for me, not to mention what's to become of me. We (the 37th Slackers) came straight from the book, and thought that we were ready for all those things we managed to learnt be4. Yet, it was a no-man's land for all of us. I dont know, it might just be me actually.

I was...pretty so-called shocked,by being so-so serious the first week..hm it wasnt all my fault. Because the personnel there treat us quite unfriendly the first month i think.. Some even got scolded because playing songs from their laptop, wooo..quite scary the person was.

I met a Mrs Jamaliah there..hmm,and she thought I was soooooo serious again,hmhmhmh.Its not good for me then I decided to be flexible a bit. And u know, first day I called her "puan" and the next it was "kak"..ehe.Then my work begun as my SV told me "Go forth, find some patents on CBS and bring them before me!!"
And so it was..I was trained in the arts of laboratory methods and enjoyed myself.Most of my time,hmm when there's no work..(oh and its hard to find some rest,ehe) Mustaqim accompany me and we started sharing stories back then.

It was busy the first 2 months, almost everyday with the smell and the sticky goo of the chocolate splattering around my lab coat.I hadnt been able to get to know the others around and spending time.(Oh and I might call it "assabiah"). Then when it turns to March we got to know each other,might be I am the loser for being the last to get to know the other comrades around. Hmmm its quite some time, and just suddenly I cannot recall when was we started spending time,but on a few occasions, I could.

Among the first was Mior, my friend from LKM (Malaysian Cocoa Board) series of solo and accompanied visits there. We started gathering and another event was hmm Mior and my birthday celebration, not forgetting Amir's Birthday at PKNS (1st time being there,though).
We made and glad we had times for that. We went through many events, many occasions,many incidents that finally made us like bonded together.As time goes on, it was a lost to the "37th Slackers" (food science of UPM) when one after one batch of once unknown friends finished their training,until there was just us (UPM) left.

We were left by the the UniKL batch,then the UKM batch,although Us and Safina extended their time with us.Then come the replacements..We were honored to meet them. We had known them for some time, and the lists were:Ammar,Ilyas,Mochen,Izanie,Kavi@Kala,Izzah,Sofia,Suriani, and the latest two, Afif and Shahrul(Long list,huh?). Day by day, and things gone slower until the day we are to end our training days. The end was quite non-dramatic, being the remnants of us made a farewell feast for the OFTEC staffs there..Amir made a good, decent slideshow there..thanks mate,appreciate that.

Hmm,so it signalled off a final end, of our good days together,of our good friendship there.
Allow me to put a few pictures here as a token of gratitude for all of us:

and farewell,may all of us be better
"Until next time~"

To Uswatun and Safina: "U NEVER LEFT US"

2009-06-06T01:54:00.000-07:00

The last remnants of UKM,
that resided and had been with us through our practical journey.
-Us no4 dr kiri,Safina no2 dr kanan-

Salam~

Its been a while since I wrote..
Last week, a bit,really a bit dizzy and have no mood in posting any.
So..
For this week, I'll be writing for the past week.

We lost two more friends, two wonderful and unique..each one of them..
MOst of us already know, but those who affected most were the "cheese-producing" students of under Dr. Karimah,MPOB..Those two were Uswatun Hasanah and Nor Safina.This shall be a tribute to them..

I remembered, their first days with us....
When all the students were trapped in the library..I could only see them sitting with Marone and Zaki@Max..Not knowing each other, hmm..its like they are close but cannot be reached.
Not until our life in the Bakery Lab started to rock!That we made things together,we've been doing great things together,and even spend time together in several occasions, the most memorable for them would be..the celebration of their last day at the cheese pilot plant..
Where the other comrades sang and dedicate songs for these two..
How I remembered them..
hmmm~

Safina~
She was a bit shy, and probably less talked with me,
Until the lst 2 months ago I think we started to be better..and knowing
And that I started to know that she had found great joy within this practical time,
And I am glad to be a part of the joyful things around her.
Also she always misunderstood my points and have a font in saying things half way (sorry Safina)On the other hand, she had proved she was so with us that she still came, even her time has already ended and be with us at the lab..how I am so grateful..Ha~A promise to her: A bar of chocolate..(no worries, I hold onto my words)Lastly she be4 she left..she gave us a present, no its 2 presents..Two big wall hangings (wooden decorations),tq safina~
As a token of gratitude..I'd suggested they hang one at the Bakery lab,
And the other one at the cheese plant.

Uswatun~
She was, less talkative the first months I think (btulkan klau salah,hehe)
And that she rarely shared anything with us
But we still knew that, she likes colorful things and is a very creative person
And at the same time I could say I noticed,
no.. everyone noticed she's a camera's best friend with...
With unbelievable face modes and the unique "peace" symbol,
whenever a camera focused onto her..
Also, a lot of colorful decorations she left at the Bakery lab a.k.a "Students' Lair"
During the last days, really...
So many times she shed her tears..I am so~ like loosing a life-long friend..
although beberapa bulan sj kenal.

So...my last words would be "U NEVER LEFT US"
That u two are always in our memories..we'll meet again,next sem..insyaAllah~

A Blackout~

2009-05-25T07:54:00.001-07:00

Yesterday...
There was a blackout in this apartment of Seri Putra..and it so happened during the 9.15 pm..when people are doing their night activities. So~ Mior and me got frustrated as we are using our computers and suddenly, so-called "sentap jugaklah". Then we made ourselves to the verandah and start sharing stories..and hoped the power will be restored a.s.a.p.

But~~~
It didnt. So we got tired of waiting. Thats where the foods came in.. We did bought food from the "pasar malam" down there earlier..so we decided to eat it, "bertemankan lampu" flashlight from my rusty nokia phone..and so it became a flashlight dinner.How "kelam kabut" it was and we had food scattered (sorry Maru) be4 we cleaned it all..

Hmm~~~
Time passed by..and we made ur minds that the power will be back by tomorrow. Sleep was the best idea, and none of us preferred more than a good night's sleep after a tiring Saturday so-called stay-up (Ask Mior what he did), which I slept on the cool floor that made me sneezing the whole Sunday.

And~~~
At that time, both of us remember stories..of our ancestors..we talked about the gasoline-based lightings and lanterns that they used. Memories of the older generations whom survived without electricity..and yet just one day, no...its just one night and we were already complaining this and that.

Reminded me~~~
Of my father..that he used to study "bertemankan pelita minyak tanah" besides him. Really, the spirit of doing so,burns and ignites ny heart, that this man,now my father..had worked hard to help fulfilling my grandma's wish to be "berdikari" and be able to aid the family. Reminded me also all the things he had to do and sacrifice for the family. I was like.."terfikir", had I did anything that could make him feel better, and lessen the burden of the family? My time will come, insyaAllah...it will be my turn to return the favor..for my father. It was 1979 that electricity or so-called "karan" found its way to my village, its Kampung Padang Perak, A/Star, Kedah. It was really, a moment to remember (Aifa, I borrow ur famous phrase)

THE LESSONs I LEARNT THAT NIGHT WERE:

1. We should always be ready to accept anything that happens eventhough we had tried ur best..It might be our efforts, but what Allah determines will happen. Nothing precedes that.

2.That we always complain when we lost something..but less times we appreciate things around when the things are still available at that time. Think about others that might be in harsher condition than us.We'll be grateful.

3.My father, Muhamad Hasbullah..deserves to be valued here for his grim determination for bringing us up..we,ur sons and daughters all knew too well what had happened. Allah will grant u appropriately, and we will pray for u..now and always.

Reflection From My Own Mirror

2009-05-18T22:48:00.000-07:00

I have a mirror, hanging on the old wall,
I have only been using it,
Since the past 2 years,

Before this, the mirror has always been there,
But i did not use it..

Why am I that stubborn?

The mirror, reflects me, showing me myself,

Of different faces in different times,

Of different angles of the same person,

Been showing me the past, present, but never the future,

Why,the mirror cannot show me my future?

The reflection way, always the same,
But the reflected person is not,

Being ashamed when my face wrinkled,
Being happy when mine shone,

But I do not know of what will my face be,
Each time facing the mirror,

Why, will a person ever be the same forever?

Seeing my own reflection,
Shown me of myself and made me wonder,

How I am to others around,
And what others would think of this man,

That differs each time in front of the always-true mirror,

Not knowing when will be my last time attending the mirror.......

Bila Manusia Berjalan dgn kejayaan palsu~

2009-05-15T08:35:00.000-07:00

Manusia boleh berjalan di muka bumi,tp ketahuilah sebab anda mmpu berjalan di muka bumi adalah dgn izin Allah~
Manusia,termasuk diriku..sering terlupa di mana diri berpijak,
Tidak tahu di mana kemuliaan diri yg sebenar...

Seringkali~
Kita merasakan bhw mulia itu dgn byknya harta, mulia itu bila tgginya pangkat...
Dgn itu berjalanlah si manusia, dgn sombong dn bongkak merasakan kejayaan dunia itulah kemuliaannya,
Serentak itu memandang rendah manusia lain, sedangkan hny Allah yg tahu kedudukan hambanya..
Dan memuja2 dunia bagaikan ianya akan kekal selamanya, sedangkan dunia ini adalah ujian semata2...
Tanpa menyedari saat itu semakin hampir...

Lebih baik~
Merasakan diri xpunya apa2, rendahkan diri walau dgn sesiapa
Bersangka baiklah dgn sesiapa jua,dn jika ada rasa dengki buangkanlah kerana ia xbermakna
Pendekkanlah angan2mu..tiada siapa tahu di mana hujung hayat kita~

Dgn itu, bangun dn doakan semua agar diberi petunjuk oleh Allah, dn minta Allah kekalkan petunjuk~

TAKING SHELTER DURING THE STORM, AND LEARN TO RECOVER~

2009-05-12T09:28:00.000-07:00

I wake up one day.And waited the sun to rise..And hoped that the bright day going to last for the whole day~

But then, as I made my way, searching for the path of my life and clearing the obstacles on the so many paths available~

I could see the horizon became blackened, strong winds blowing dark clouds towards my way, herald the coming of a great,tremendous storm..that~

Every time it came, it forced me to find cover, and the strong winds which always been smearing back my hard work of clearing my chosen path..even adding in new obstacles...

Even though many times I have experienced the storm, everytime it came back, it was like, "I have never seen or be in this situation...

Seeing the terrifying sight made me wonder.."Will I be able to take shelter when the storm comes, and will I be able to recover the path chosen,or start again trodding a new path"

All give me a good lesson~

"That I be patient in overcoming the storm and its effects, and be patient in recovering the chosen path of my life.."

Band of Brothers

2009-05-08T06:52:00.000-07:00

P/s : Uzaini,Iqbal,Ajue..sorry for i didnt hv ur pic included~

After action report of today:

Its Friday, 8th MAY 2009
the last working day of this week

And it seemed to carve me straight,deep in my heart that there will not be the same people next week during our practical time..

Time passes by, showing that everything that has a beginning has an end~
It seemed like its just yesterday when I last met these friends

I still remember~
Where exactly I first greet these people..

Where first I met Mustaqim
In the registration room..I just knew it that it was a UKM student and that he will be borrowing my pen when I saw his wasnt in good condition.And so he did~
and we became friends and started even harsh jokes on the first day
A highly disciplined person,and always give but never ask anything in return
Much I learnt from him.

When I first met Aifa :-),
I knew she is a good person..and I knew she will think me as a verily arrogant person..and so she did.I first "tegur" Aifa when in a little "Demo Kitchen",asking the name and her course in U. But we did not tegur2 for 2 months.And that only I started to knew her when I started cooling myself down at the Bakery Lab,where it all begins..Where my mind becoming clearer and clearer about her,little I knew that what was to become..;-)
AND SO IT BECAME~

When I first met Ain
She wasnt so talkative..and hardly be able to "jumpa" in the so-called dairy lab
A hard-working person she is..finished her works fast and efficient..how I wanted to challenge the discipline shown

When I first met the Nutrition personnels,
There were 3 of em..Iqbal,Zaza and Ajue.
All of them wasnt really well known,er I wasnt so talkative also..heh
But still they are friends to be treasured.

When I met the Margarine Girls~
That had been with Mr Hanif for 4 months
They are Hadani,Nurul..
Whom I first met both in the margarine plant
They were hard-working and really struggled alongside Hanif

When I met this Farhah UniKL
That she was with Ain and Aini at the dairy lab
Hmm..drove a sporty car she did
And became a trademark..heh
But we didnt get to know much,sorry but it was an honor.

When I met the Analytical "ROCK&ROLL" personnels,
Uzaini,Fatin and Farhana..these were very friendly actually.And it was me that wasnt too friendly. All I knew they are people with future visions, and always wanted to go forward, challenging themselves to be better.

But not all is lost,since Uswatun Hasanah and Safina from UKM will still be here,if i am not mistaken until 22nd of May 2009..the last remnants of UKM.

Know we did each other, and much we shared..I shall be dedicating a poem to all when my mind is ready~
All I can say know is that I learnt much from our days together,how I remember and wanted to treasure all of u..

So be4 I end this post, I want all of us:
PRAY THAT MAY ALLAH GUIDE ALL OF US TO THE RIGHT PATH, AND MADE US ALL STAYED IN THAT PATH UNTIL DEATH~
It is an honor to know u all..and the honor will always be mine~

2009-05-07T07:02:00.000-07:00

Sometimes..

One person is just someone,
Who wanted to see u but just bashing the gates..
Sometimes its just someone,
Who wanted to see u and walk past the gate but stopped at the front door without knocking..
Sometimes its just someone,
Who wanted to see u,walk past the gate,stopped at the front door,knocks but being impatience..that he left be4 u could open the door..
BUT~
There will be someone,that walks past the gates,knocks the front door,and patiently waited for u to open the door..
THIS ONE~
Is a true friend

The Sun Sets~

2009-05-07T00:02:00.000-07:00

The days are numbered..our days..[Dedicated to All Practical Students of MPOB]

At times, we can smile or just smile,
When actually things are not they are,
When all seems starting to wither,
At the moment and peak of wonder.

There were times we shared the smiles,
In between the times when tears are shed together,
Let the pictures be the medium of remembrance,
That leads all but none to wonder and keep on wonder.

As the leaves came down from their holder,
The old ones shed, leaving young buds together
While the shadow of the sun setting behind altogether,
Until the moon came, giving hope and promises better.

Learn to let all go as they must,
Allow new things to grow as they would,
And accept whatever happened as it is,
And take with ourselves only good matters together.

Past Purposes~

2009-05-05T07:21:00.000-07:00

Today... i got a few lessons

Good ones..always good ones...After action report of today:~

Came back to MPOB (Malaysian PAlm Oil Board)..really late,its a problem when many things got screwed up, "Blasts, my heart is burning coz i made an agreement with my friends,i will be a burden for my waiting friends." However these boys were extremely patience..my sincerest thanks to Ahmad Marwan and Najib, whom go to extreme length in getting me to MPOB.But everything happpened is from Allah indeed, we should accept whatever happens. Alhamdulillah,praise to Allah that always protect us..whether we know how or not~

Nearly passed out, I struggled to make haste and continue my work today.Pushed myself to the max be4 falling down at 12.45 pm today. Really,no energy left...

Met two new brothers today:~

Please welcome : Brother Ilyas and Amar from USM, 2nd year from pure chemistry.Made friends with this two..chat for a while and therefore we r now friends.

GOOD LESSONS TODAY:
1. Learnt to improve our patience,always useful..it'll be a big problem when one acts without thinking,or the actions were influenced by mere emotions.

2.The act of my comrades today,that awaits me,even knowing i will be very late..is truly a sign of true friendship. I will protect this relationship,with my prayers to Allah.

3.Smile,always try to smile even in the most harsh situations..that'll lessen other people troubles from thinking too much about us, and know that we have Allah~